Penny Thoughts ‘12—Christmas Vacation (1989) ****

PG-13, 97 min.

Director: Jeremiah Chechik

Writer: John Hughes

Starring: Chevy Chase, Beverly D’Angelo, Juliette Lewis, Johnny Galecki, John Randolph, Diane Ladd, E.G. Marshall, Doris Roberts, Randy Quaid, Miriam Flynn, Cody Burger, Ellen Hamilton Latzen, William Hickey, Mae Questel, Sam McMurray, Nicholas Guest, Julia Louis-Dreyfuss, Nicolette Scorsese, Brian Doyle-Murray

While “A Christmas Story” was a whole new experience this year, our screening of National Lampoon’s “Christmas Vacation” was something more typical. Two days before Christmas. We haven’t wrapped any gifts, so throw on a movie that we know and love, and lets crank these things out.

As usual, Angie ended up doing most of the wrapping while I watched most of this movie that I’ve seen so many times that I know all the lines in order. My mom fell asleep.

It’s nice to throw these movies on without having to worry whether you actually see everything or not. You can walk out of the room to get some egg nog and say all the lines in your head, come back into the room where it’s playing and you haven’t missed a beat. Or perhaps that’s just me.

There’s really only one thing that needs to be said about this movie…

“Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fucking Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse.”